I am thrilled at the news of your first pregnancy!
I thought I would share with you some reflections during motherhood, however simple they may be.
You have peeked at many journals of mine:) Now here is one written especially for you in hopes of helping, encouraging, and challenging you in your pursuit of holiness in your new role as a mom. Keep in mind, I am writing to remind myself of these things, as well...
I'll love you always,
Charity
Wednesday, November 23, 2016
Keep Calm and Speak Softer
Elizabeth Eliot's Four Principles to establish verbal authority are good rules of thumb to prevent your children delaying obedience:
1. Speak the child's name in a calm tone of voice
2. Establish eye contact
3. Issue a one word command, "No" or "Come"
4. Do not repeat
Number one has been good for me to practice the most. I tend to get louder to get my child's attention, but really it's better to stay calm and get softer with my tone.
Establishing eye contact is also important because your child could be distracted and you need to make sure they are listening to you.
Number 4 is easier said than done, lol!
1. Speak the child's name in a calm tone of voice
2. Establish eye contact
3. Issue a one word command, "No" or "Come"
4. Do not repeat
Number one has been good for me to practice the most. I tend to get louder to get my child's attention, but really it's better to stay calm and get softer with my tone.
Establishing eye contact is also important because your child could be distracted and you need to make sure they are listening to you.
Number 4 is easier said than done, lol!
Emphasize Jesus' Grace More Than Your Child's Goodness
This concept has changed the way I praise my kids when they have done the right thing. Rather than only saying, "Good job for obeying, Emmaline! You are such a good girl!", I try to focus the praise on Christ and say, "Thank you, Lord for giving Emmaline the strength to obey and for working in her heart!"
The worst thing we can do to our kids is make them rely on themselves to do good and never consider the fact that without Christ, they can do nothing.
The worst thing we can do to our kids is make them rely on themselves to do good and never consider the fact that without Christ, they can do nothing.
Relationships Are Always Worth It
If you are a task-oriented person (like myself) this is a concept you may struggle with from time to time.
"Aw man! I chose to play trucks with my boys and now look at how much laundry has piled up!"
Worth it.
"Oh darn, I should have not gone to the park with the family because I didn't get to clean the kitchen."
Nope, that was worth it, too.
When all is said and done, relationships matter more than tasks...which is a crushing realization for the die-hard-do-list-doer, but if it makes you feel better, put 'invest in relationships' on your do-list and get it done!
"If you don't listen eagerly to the little stuff when they are little, they won't tell you the big stuff when they are big, because to them all of it has always been big stuff." -CMW
"Aw man! I chose to play trucks with my boys and now look at how much laundry has piled up!"
Worth it.
"Oh darn, I should have not gone to the park with the family because I didn't get to clean the kitchen."
Nope, that was worth it, too.
When all is said and done, relationships matter more than tasks...which is a crushing realization for the die-hard-do-list-doer, but if it makes you feel better, put 'invest in relationships' on your do-list and get it done!
"If you don't listen eagerly to the little stuff when they are little, they won't tell you the big stuff when they are big, because to them all of it has always been big stuff." -CMW
Jesus Understands YOU
In other words, He was tired and had to still meet people's needs.
The story of Jesus feeding the 5000 jumped out at me tonight in a whole new way (Mark 6).
First, Jesus and His disciples were trying to recover from a long day and were in need of quiet and rest.
Mark 6:31 says there were so many people coming and going that "they had no leisure even to eat".
YUP! I can identify with that :)
They got in a boat to withdraw to a desolate place (sounds nice at times, haha!) and thousands of people ran ahead of them and got there before them. (Yikes!).
Ok, I'm envisioning you, as a mama, running on lack of sleep, not able to eat, desperate for peace and quiet when lo and behold, Ryan and Brady wake up and need you (it will probably feel like their are thousands of them in that moment, haha).
The people were NEEDY, just like your precious twins will be, and their were many that needed healed (Luke 9:11). Look at the response of Jesus when He came ashore:
"He had compassion on them, because they were like sheep without a shepherd".
Oh, that this might be our response as mothers! In many ways, our little ones are lambs in need of our loving guidance and care. May we have compassionate hearts toward them as we tend to their needs.
Oh and guess how the story ends? It got really late and the people were hungry.
GO FIGURE!
The story of Jesus feeding the 5000 jumped out at me tonight in a whole new way (Mark 6).
First, Jesus and His disciples were trying to recover from a long day and were in need of quiet and rest.
Mark 6:31 says there were so many people coming and going that "they had no leisure even to eat".
YUP! I can identify with that :)
They got in a boat to withdraw to a desolate place (sounds nice at times, haha!) and thousands of people ran ahead of them and got there before them. (Yikes!).
Ok, I'm envisioning you, as a mama, running on lack of sleep, not able to eat, desperate for peace and quiet when lo and behold, Ryan and Brady wake up and need you (it will probably feel like their are thousands of them in that moment, haha).
The people were NEEDY, just like your precious twins will be, and their were many that needed healed (Luke 9:11). Look at the response of Jesus when He came ashore:
"He had compassion on them, because they were like sheep without a shepherd".
Oh, that this might be our response as mothers! In many ways, our little ones are lambs in need of our loving guidance and care. May we have compassionate hearts toward them as we tend to their needs.
Oh and guess how the story ends? It got really late and the people were hungry.
GO FIGURE!
Put Socks On Yo Feet
I do not like my floor covered in crumbs and I especially do not enjoy my feet coated in crumbs from the floor 😤 If I am just not able to sweep that moment, the best solution is to stick a pair of socks on my feet so I won't be constantly reminded of the crumbs.
What "socks" do you need to put on to alleviate the pain of something being undone? For example, it is highly unlikely for there not to be dirty dishes out on the counter during the day, but I try to wipe the counters and put the dishes in the sink to do later. If you aren't able to get a shower, throw your hair up in a messy bun and put on mascara. If you don't have a chance to read the Word, turn on a sermon while folding clothes.
You are so productive that you probably will be a 'barefoot mama!'
What "socks" do you need to put on to alleviate the pain of something being undone? For example, it is highly unlikely for there not to be dirty dishes out on the counter during the day, but I try to wipe the counters and put the dishes in the sink to do later. If you aren't able to get a shower, throw your hair up in a messy bun and put on mascara. If you don't have a chance to read the Word, turn on a sermon while folding clothes.
You are so productive that you probably will be a 'barefoot mama!'
Have You Sung Today?
Have you sung today, sweet sister?
Singing soothes the soul. Sometimes I just start singing whatever words I'm saying and make it silly and fun.
There have been times when I feel so overwhelmed by the tasks ahead of me and when I begin to sing, peace floods my spirit.
A few of my favorite 'rescue melodies' are:
As the Deer
Have Thine Own Way
More Love to Thee
Great is Thy Faithfulness
Give Thanks to the Lord
There is a Redeemer
Like a River Glorious
You have a beautiful voice, Bethany. Like an angel! Never stop singing.
Singing soothes the soul. Sometimes I just start singing whatever words I'm saying and make it silly and fun.
There have been times when I feel so overwhelmed by the tasks ahead of me and when I begin to sing, peace floods my spirit.
A few of my favorite 'rescue melodies' are:
As the Deer
Have Thine Own Way
More Love to Thee
Great is Thy Faithfulness
Give Thanks to the Lord
There is a Redeemer
Like a River Glorious
You have a beautiful voice, Bethany. Like an angel! Never stop singing.
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